Search This Blog

Thursday, 21 April 2011

New Poll

Hi blogosphere,

To solve my dilemma (because you rarely comment on my posts) I've decided to poll you. The poll closes on the date I expect to next see the betee. I'll let the poll influence my final decision on the matter.

Theme Songs of my Life

Hey there blogosphere,

Did you know that I'm sensitive? As part of an ongoing series of posts about the theme songs of my life, I thought this simple plan tune is appropriate. Here it is:





Ok blogosphere, you got me. I'm not sure if "welcome to my life" applies to someone who spent the better part of the weekend crushing beers and potato salad. And no, I didn't post the video because it happens to be a friends favorite song (as per usual, I will not out anyone, so I'll refer to him as M. Smith...no, that's far to obvious...Lets call him Matt S.).

Blogsphere, I posted this video because I am in a bit of a moral dilemma. On the weekend I may - or may not, this is NOT an admission of guilt - have lost a bet. It was based on the subtitle of a photo I posted on facebook. Now, the premise of the supposed bet, according to the incumbent (did I use that word right?) was that I didn't think the subtitle to a photo of "Matt Smith Band" on a sign from the Red Lion in Belleville said "welcome to my life". Indeed, it turns out those words do appear in the subtitle - in homage to the real Matt S.'s favorite song. The question I pose to you blogosphere, is should I pay up, despite the fact that I refuse to admit that a legitimate bet took place.

Lets go over what a legitimate bet must have.

First, 2 willing parties.

Blogosphere, I came out and said "20 bucks". Whenever you bet such a large amount of money, your just trying to submit the betee into not taking your bet, and then laugh at them. It's the equivalent to a bluff in poker. The acceptance of such an offer does NOT mean theres 2 willing parties, just one.

Second, a hand shake

A hand shake did not take place blogosphere, as far as I can recollect.

Third, CREDIBLE and IMPARTIAL witnesses.

Blogosphere, there's no one in the world who would like to see me get my come-up-ins than these witnesses. The first witness, lets call him punch-bag, would sell me down a river for a dime if he ever got the chance. The second, lets call her dry heaves, may be impartial, but certainly not credible - as evidence in her nick-name.

So blogosphere, I think you'll agree with me, no bet took place. Will I eventually pay up? Stay tuned blogosphere...and no, I won't.

Friday, 15 April 2011

Just Imagine the Freedom

Hey there blogosphere,



A few of my colleagues from work have decided to waste our money on a Lotto Max ticket for this upcoming draw. I don't know how I get talked into these things blogosphere. I guess it's just the calling of the "party in da club popping bottles full of bub" life-style that I find so appealing.

But before I break out the Cristal, lets put our nerd goggles on and examine the probability of winning.

There are 7 numbers picked from a pool of 49 numbers. So, statistically, the probability of winning is: (1/49)*(1/48)*(1/47)*(1/46)*(1/45)*(1/44)*(1/43)

Some people think it's 1/49 to the 7th power, but after the first number is drawn, there are only 48 left to draw from (slightly improving your odds). The answer above is in the range of 10^-12, or a 0.000000000001 chance of winning.

What I find funny about this whole thing, blogosphere, is how even with such a small chance of winning, some of my "partners" are looking to backstab the others. Now I won't name names blogosphere - I didn't get into this business to "out" people like some white collared pencil pushing journalist, that's not my style. But, I will tell you that being involved in this intense drama is like living an episode of survivor.

Colby from Survivor: The Australian Outback
Now blogsphere, I'm no rat - no Johnny playfair, if you will. In fact, most people would probably relate me to being more of a Colby (heart of gold, athletic build, etc. etc.). In case you don't remember, Colby dominated the final stretch of immunity challenges ensuring himself a final spot at tribal council. He then loyally brought Tina with him, a move that would ultimately cost him 900,000 bones. Like Colby, if I were in a game of survivor I imagine being a dominant force in the immunity challenges. But would I take Tina over Keith? (Keith was generally disliked and would probably only get a vote from Jerri in the final tribal council, and I suspect that vote would only be because Colby decided not to give her a lift to pound-town during the show)

Artist Rendition of Snake in Grass
Well that's a tough hypothetical question, and I won't answer it. But, being the Colby that I am, I definitely won't be aligning myself with this two timing snake-in-the-grass trying to turn his quarter pot into a third. That's not Colby type behavior. But I do appreciate him coming to me to form an alliance first. Now I can at least prepare myself for the inevitable double cross coming my way, and try to prevent it. More Imporantly, it gives me the opportunity to send this "partner" a public warning: Do Not Mess with The Dog.

I know what your thinking blogosphere. Relating my current situation (just a refresher, this post started with me having a 1/4 stake in a lottery ticket) to Colby's in Survivor the Australian Outback is a bit of a stretch. Well, your wrong. Sure, I didn't have to eat nothing but rice for 4 weeks to get this lottery ticket. But I did have to smell street-crawler B.O. for 4 minutes whilst I waited in line for my ticket - just as grueling.

Reflecting back, it's funny isn't it blogosphere. One minute, your enjoying a nice stroll down bloor street, dancing over puke and side-stepping piss puddles. The next minute, your sucked into the 7/11, buying a lottery ticket, and your world is flipped upside down...and we haven't even won yet.